And I'm back to a 'normal' life

Two and a half months later and I've officially submitted my application to the DGA Training Program.

Things are going pretty well for me at the moment.  I have a job (for the next month) and I'm apparently a decent guy to work with.

I'm excited about what the future has to hold and look forward to all it's challenges.  Bring it on.

Finding a Home In 4 A.M.

So it's happened.

I've become a citizen of 4 AM.  I often find that my stride is reached right around 3 or 4 AM and then I'm home.  Driving the nearly empty streets of L.A. has become a lifestyle, a piece of time that I share with no one else.

Taco carts closing shop, homeless crowded around 7-Eleven or sleeping on benches, neon glowing darker than NY; this city is a mirror of itself at night, a doppleganger.  I find that it's easy to sit back and enjoy the ride.  Point A to Point B, this city is a maze of empty streets waiting for the slep of feet and tread of tires to wake it up and bring itself to live again.

I often find myself out, listening to music as I go about my tasks.  Imogen Heap, 'First Train Home' is an excellent companion.

Move...again.

There's something therapeutic about moving.  It's a time to look at everything you own, collect, and let define you.  You can look at all these things and take them with you or you can choose to leave them behind.

So, here's the big news; I'm in L.A. for the long haul.  Today I filled out an app for an apartment in Hollywood.  It's a one bedroom, but between Matt and I, it's a perfect fit and hopefully a home for the next twelve months.  We're both looking forward to the change and welcome the new challenges and experiences associated with such a move.

So begins a new chapter (cliche, but appropriate) and a spring cleaning of body and soul.  Along with this toxin-removal (of the inter-personal variety, I still plan to tox it up on the weekends; youth) I would like to make a few resolutions.  I've found in the last year that my will has really solidified and I'm able to take control of my life a bit more than I originally thought possible.  One of which is writing.  I miss taking the time to sit down and just let some thoughts hit pad; key or paper, whatever is available.

With the resolutions I've made, I'm thinking life should be taking an amazing turn into uncharted territory.  I'm ready and anticipating the next few months.  Let's see what happens when a mid-west farm boy (stereotypes, we all have them) moves to the big city and tries to take on one of the most cut-throat industries in America.

Updates

Posted on my new website: http://web.me.com/tarobb1/Epic_Road_Trip

99 more to go

Well, I kinda fucked up today.

As a Producer/Production Manager I should've been able to come up with a suitable replacement, but I couldn't.

We'll be shooting tomorrow, but damn.  Gotta do better next time.

The Day I Had Cancer

I rolled out of bed this morning and squared up to go to the doctor.

I was running late, and not really sure where I was going.  2501 N. Orange Ave.  Dr. Ali Gaham.

I plugged the address into my iPhone and I was off, on my way.  I rolled up to the Florida Hospital and immediately started kicking myself for not recognizing the address.  I parked in the garage on King and walked into the lobby of the Hospital.  The receptionist directed me upstairs and down a long winding hall.  The hall was kinda confusing and made me glad I don’t suffer from dementia.  The floor was littered with used wash cloths...I didn’t look too closely.

I filled out all the proper paperwork and was in the patient room in no time.  The nurse (Nurse Nosey) went into detail about a lot of things in my life that I didn’t expect.  Contraceptives, sexual partners, preferences...it was rapid fire questioning.  Whoa.

Dr. Ali came in.  I checked out and he said that he wanted to run some follow up blood tests.

I got my blood drawn (four vials) and was woozy as I left the hospital; I even forgot to have my parking validated.

It was all good, but by the time I got home I needed to eat food.

I made some food but before I could eat, I got a call from Dr. Gasham.

“Everything looks good.  You aren’t showing any inclination toward Diabetes.  Your Thyroids are fine, but you need to come back in so that we can talk about your LPDs.  They’re a bit higher than I’d like.”

“Alright, I’ll schedule an appointment.”

“See you soon.”

I sat down to eat and got curious.  What are LPDs.  I wonder if there’s something I can do be prepared for a change.

I wikipeida-ed LPDs, and what I found was scary.

Lymphoproliferative disorders (LPDs) refer to several conditions in which lymphocytes are produced in excessive quantities. They typically occur in patients who have compromised immune systems. They are sometimes equated with "immunoproliferative disorders", but technically Lymphoproliferative disorders are a subset of immunoproliferative disorders, along with hypergammaglobulinemia and paraproteinemias.

I tried to remain calm.  WTF?

I called back and set up my appointment for the following Monday.  As soon as possible.

I waited around for two hours, and then I couldn’t take it any more.  I called Dr. Gasham back.

“I need to know, what’s up with these LPDs?  Are they seriou-”

“LPDs?  What are those?”

“I thought you said my LPDs were high?”

“LDL.  Your LDL is higher than I would like.  What are LPDs?”

I explained, and he joked with me about it.  Phew...thank God.

So, long story short, my last year of working has done a lot for me, but it hasn’t done everything it needs to, and I might need to go on medication.  There was talk that I might not be able to fix it on my own, a possible deficiency on my body’s part.  Oh, well.  At least I don’t have cancer.

68 Days...

Man,

We've wrapped on our 35mm and that means that things at Full Sail are winding down.  Just over two months from now I need to be doing something that forwards my career, but what?

I think about everything I've built here.  The friends, the network, the life - and I wonder what will happen to all that.  Will I be able to do it again?  Will I be sucessful?  Will I be able to stay in contact with all my friends again?  Does any of that matter?  Just because I want things to stay the same, doesn't mean that they will.

I set my jaw, look to the future and hope that I can be content; happy, even.

I've come to be content and at times downright happy with the last 18 months.  I've forged some friendships that will be difficult to leave, and hopefully some that will continue to florish.

Hope, I guess that's all that I can do.  Hope and work.

We'll see what happens from that point on.

Because I need a moment

Step 1: Put your music player on random.
Step 2: Post the first line from the first 50 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly (No lyric hunting! That is cheating!)

1. Well, this hurts me more than I can stand to say
2. You know I try to get close to you
3. I tried to paint you a picture, the colors were all wrong
4. I'm holding on your rope
5. Stress can breed a psychopath
6. You've got your ball, you've got your chain
7. Meet me where the city turns to trees and nothing comes for free
8. Hello World
9. I had a dream we went away, left this city for a day
10. Safety pins hold up the things
11. You're sorry now
12. I'm sinking yet I'll stride
13. I'm gonna take you down to the market, lover
14. I've been cheated by you since I don't know when
15. It's been a while since the two of us talked
16. I fly like paper, get high like planes
17. If I had no more time
18. It may not feel too classy
19. Finally I figured out
20. There's something I need to show you
21. I'm not one for love songs
22. Every night devise
23. Standing on a building
24. The wilted flowers that I gave
25. Motorcycle's in the parking lot
26. Maybe if my heart stops beating
27. Jessie says she's been here for a thousand days
28. Do you know where your heart is?
29. Any dolt with half a brain
30. I'm a suspect, I'm a traitor
31. They're turning away from me
32. This place is a prison
33. You promised me starry night skies
34. If it takes away the pain it's all right
35. You were the sweetest thing that I ever knew
36. I got your runaway smile in my piggybank baby
37. I can't beleive the news today
38. Sittin' here eatin' my heart out waitin'
39. Wishes bounce me weightless
40. You took my hand, you showed me how
41. They told him don't you ever come around here
42. Last night I fell in love without you.
43. Let me apologize to begin with
44. So in the meantime
45. If the fish swam out of the ocean
46. Old John from his deathbed cried
47. Early in the mornin'
48. I'm coming out of my cage
49. Bones are broken and the will is sunk
50. Sometimes the snow comes down in June

Resolutions - 09

Here’s the deal.  I don’t care who you are, what you do, or what you expect from me, but this year is going to be mine.

2008 was great, but 2009 will be epic.

Here’s a brief re-cap of 2008:

1. I entered Sophomore, Junior, and Senior year.
2. I started learning how to take care of myself physically, and it’s paid off.
3. I worked on over 17 separate productions (music videos, independent productions, class projects, etc.)
4. I’ve managed to develop my social skills to an area that I didn’t really consider an option previously (at least for work).
5. I assessed my priorities and have been able to realize that I don’t need to have a set path.
6. In the last year of school, I was late to class once.
7. I started to develop contacts, local and national, within the Television/Film Industry
8. I learned to let go a bit more...
9. I kept in contact with those who mean something to me, although sometimes difficult.
10. I solidified some new friendships that I hope will continue to develop.
11.  I worked my ass off; see numbers 1 thru 10.

P.S. - 12. I contacted a talent agency directly; attempting to garner talent for a low budget-independent short.

As I look to the future, I see lots of things that are beginning to develop.

I’m about to start my career.
I have no five year plan, except to succeed.
I’m going to be roughing it for a bit, and enjoying every miserable minute.
I finally feel the ability to deny access to myself from people who constantly pain me.
I am going to live life like it’s going out of fuckin’ style!

These are just a few of the affirmations/resolutions I’ve made to myself this year.  There are a few others, but they’re personal, so if you’re nosey enough to ask, I might tell you.

Fuck it.
Fight on.